Carmen Electra celebrates her birthday in VegasApril 26th, 2009

Bowie's Hotness Scale = 9 out of 10 (still hot)

Carmen may be 37 years old, but she looks like she's still 20, and this obviously is with a little help from some good plastic surgeons and a few gallons of botox, but hell who cares what it takes to make you into a hot chick, because in the end all that matters is whether you're hot or not and nobody cares how you got there.

Gisele Bundchen at The Rainforest Alliance GalaMay 6th, 2009

Bowie's Hotness Scale = 6 out of 10 (overrated)

Let me set the record straight once and for all... Gisele Bundchen is not hot. She's average at best. The only reason that I can see why anyone would be attracted to her is because she's tall and has a few heavily airbrushed pictures in a magazine, there's absolutely nothing beautiful about her. With her big chin and even bigger nose I was'nt sure if I was looking at a picture of her or of wrestling great Andre the Giant. There are so many hotter chicks than Gisele and I'm sure Tom Brady will be sharing his bed with lots of them come this NFL season.

Jillian Reynolds at the American Idol Top 13 PartyMarch 5th, 2009

Bowie's Hotness Scale = 3 out of 10 (more annoying than ever)

Don't you think by this point Jillian has made enough money to get that thing removed from her face? If I was her my only focus in life would be to do whatever it took to get rid of it, I don't care at what cost or how long it would take, just do it, because whatever beauty she once had is gone and all that is left is a mole on her face that is possibly infected with a disease that they have yet to find a cure for.

Megan Corkrey at the American Idol Top 13 PartyMarch 5th, 2009

Bowie's Hotness Scale = 6 out of 10 (houston, we have a problem)

I've never watched American Idol and don't care about American Idol, but since seeing pictures of Megan I think I'm going to have to start to tune in, but before I get all gushy over this broad we have a problem, and in the words of Paris Hilton it's "HUGE". Remember that shot in the movie Halloween where you think you're looking at an empty room, but then you spot Michael Myers in the corner of the room and it scares the hell out of you, well that's the way I felt when I looked down from her face to her tatoo sleeve on her right arm, but in this case I was more scared of her tatoo sleeve than a masked killer with a butcher knife. My advice would be for Megan to spend whatever money she makes from Idol and get that thing on her arm lasered off, and I don't care if it takes 500 appointments to remove it, just get it done so you'll stop scaring the crap out of me.

Jaime Pressly at her book signingMarch 19th, 2009

Bowie's Hotness Scale = 8 out of 10 (lost by a nose)

So the question was posed "Is Jaime Pressly still hot?", but I think the question that should be asked is "Was Jaime Pressly ever hot?" and the answer is yes, but just barely. It obvious that she's a good looking woman, but she has a major problem right in the middle of her face... her nose. If she had a better looking nose she would most likely be a 10 instead of just an 8. The problem with her nose is the tip sticks out a bit too far and is wide and it's also kind of bulbous looking, now from what I know about her she was a model since she was 16 and I don't think ever had a nose job, if she has had one it was botched... and botched badly. It's probably too late to get a nose job because it would just be too obvious that she had it done, the best time to do it is when you're just up and coming and not too well known, like Avril Lavigne and Megan Fox, both had nose jobs at the beginning of their careers and nobody really noticed except for me.

Gwyneth Paltrow at LA PremireApril 1st, 2009

Bowie's Hotness Scale = 8 out of 10 (still holding up)

I must say that I was shocked when I saw how good Gwyneth is looking these days, and I was even more shocked when I read that she was 37, because she looks more like she's 27. I have never really been a big fan of her look, but she is holding up quite well. Let's be honest, when a woman hits 30 her looks go faster than a line of coke in front of Paris Hilton, but Gwyneth is still holding up. The only problem I have with her is that she has a really long neck, and to be honest, that's gross, if her neck was a bit shorter she would be much hotter, but unfortunatly for her I don't think Doctor 90210 has come up with a procedure yet to reduce neck length, but when he does Gwyneth will be way hotter!

Jenna Fischer at Her 35th Birthday in VegasMarch 28th, 2009

Bowie's Hotness Scale = 5 out of 10 (older than dirt)

Jenna recently turned 35 and sadly she looks every bit of it. I was a fan of "The Office" when it first started, but stopped watching when Steve Carrell was down to just cameo appearances since he was off making movies, but I always thought Jenna was cute and much younger than 35, but when I saw this picture I was shocked to see a haggard old woman and not the lovable and youthful Pam that I had seen on The Office. She has a cute nose, her looks nice and soft, but she just looks old... really old. I don't think botox would do her any good, I think she just has one of those old looking kinds of faces, kind of like Bea Arthur.